Is there something inside of me..

The topic is pretty self-explanatory, its been a few months since I’ve blogged things have been looking up for me here lately..until now.

I’m a little on the leery side wondering if I may currently be pregnant. I missed a few pills not even a full month ago I thought I was fine, and I had also started a pill that was supposed to make my pill less effective and i got off of it. Now here I am 2 1/2 weeks after my last “time of the month” wondering if there could possibly be a chance that I’m well pregnant.

I wouldn’t have even been the slightest bit worried till i started showing similar early symptoms that I showed the last time I got pregnant and heck I’d even agree and say “Hey its all in your head” except the vivid dreams are so vivid I can keep a dream log and still recall such vivid dreams HOURS after being awake. Looking at my pills I have 12 days till my next “time of the month” I took several tests all saying negative but it’s too early to even know..

From the recent cramping, the dreams, soreness in my lower back, I’m beginning to get a bit worried and I had planned to keep all this from my boyfriend TIL he found a pregnancy test in my purse and asked when and why I had got it.

As much as I’d love to be pregnant, like LOVE, he doesn’t want that right now since he has two of his own plus my one makes 3. Were 25 (me) and 28 (him) and yes 4 kids would be an awful lot to take on but why does part of me secretly wish that maybe something might be growing inside of me.

I guess only time will tell, it doesn’t help I haven’t been taking my pills at the same time and forgetting a lot lately. Anyone else ever experience super early symptoms before they could even test? Am I crazy for deep down kind of hoping that I could be?

-Blankk

***************************************************

GET READY FOR BIZARE. I just went on “free online tarot reading” annnnd look what my second card said:

Card 2: What you want most right now »
The Empress
The cards suggest that at this time you desire comfort, security and happiness and may well need some emotional support and reassurance.

If you are considering having a baby the desire will be very strong at this time, or perhaps you are already pregnant and you have some concerns. If male, perhaps you are considering fatherhood with someone but have concerns.

Things will turn out fine, just know that you are loved and that there are people around you who care.

JUST, WOW!

-Blankk again

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